Tuesday, July 08, 2008

I didn't use good judgment

It all started with a trip to the mall this past Saturday.

I don't go to the mall very often, and I tend to get all excited by all of the different choices. The choices were never ending. There was pretty color and fun clothes everywhere. Fun, girly, cute clothes. Lots of pink. I could have stayed there all day.

I went to B.Moss. Usually a good choice. Great store for the thirty-something crowd.

I saw a pair of shorts and I just wanted them. I don't know why. They were calling my name. They were so on sale.

So, this morning, I was in a hurry and needed something quick to wear. Something that wasn't wrinkled from sitting in the dryer all weekend.

I started out with a skirt, but the zipper kept gettin' stuck. I had to go to the shorts. I had no other options. So I put them on and went on my way. I went to a meeting. After the meeting I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror.

And these were my thoughts...

Why on earth would an almost 37 year old woman put bedazzled hearts on her butt? Why? I don't let my girls wear shorts with words on their bottoms...why would I put these shorts on and walk out of my house...why? How old am I?

Please don't think I'm being ultra conservative. I have some jeans and shorts with pockets that have some sequins and designs on the pockets. Those seem okay. And these shorts are okay too...

But (no pun intended) why would I put two large hearts on my rear? Why? Why would I want to call attention to something that is already large and doesn't need two bright blue flashers on it. I read Big Mama's blog about fashion...every Friday. I should know better.

Notice the additional sequins on the front pockets. I was obviously channeling Porter Wagner when I made this purchase.
But in my defense, Miss B.Moss buyer, what were you thinking? Did you used to be the buyer at Justice or Limited Too? Was there some confusion?

P.S. Please don't call Clinton and Stacey.

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Me said...

Hmmm, is there a way to de-bedazzle them? I mean, we have a long drive to Ridgecrest on Friday. I will take extra dramamine and doctor up those shorts.

In the words (and drawl) of Dolly Parton (aka Truvy) from Steel Magnolias, "We'll fix it, Honey. We'll fix it."

acer4u73 said...

I live in Asheville, NC,,,right down the road from where you guys are going to be:) Small world!


Mamaw said...

So all you need is your hard hat
and you can direct traffic was that left or right they were blinking to fast.Are you sure those weren't for Misty or Brianna
Well while your away just wear them and have fun if your friends will let you don't throw away the jewels I could make some nazzy cards with those. Love you have fun

Teresa said...

I'm pretty sure your mama didn't raise you to wear shorts like this.

And speaking of your Mama, I can't begin to be any funnier than she was in her comment. So I won't even try.

NC said...

Oh I think they are screaming BIG NANNY! Just be thankful you can fit in your clothes! :)

Heather Wagoner said...

I'd keep those jewels in your car... that way if your tires ever go flat on your way to pin oak again you can just glue 'em to your bumper (your car bumper that is... not the bumper they're currently glued to) and everyone will see you safely on the side of the road.

Erin said...

Those look perfect for an indoor luau (which it's looking more like we'll be having)...you just need to add a coconut bra.

Melissa Lee said...

Thanks for your comment today. I thought you had forgotten where I lived.

I am a little overcome and overwhelmed and, well, lots of other stuff.

Thanks for thinking of me, though.


Danny, Tabitha, Sean and Matthew said...

Too funny. Yes I did design my blog myself. I'm learning :0)