Thursday, February 19, 2009

When it all comes down to it....I'm a "before" picture

The Bible has a few things to say about pride and that's where I find myself this week.

Take a good look...

If you saw me yesterday or today, you know that I didn't do any fancy photoshop work with this picture. Those are my real zits.

I took this picture this morning. My face looks like a "before" picture for Stridex/Clearisal/Accutane/Proactive. I'm not very happy about it.

Long story short, I got ready in our other bathroom one day this week and I used a tube of face wash that was already in that shower...BIG MISTAKE! I didn't notice anything on Monday but by Tuesday afternoon I could literally feel the zits erupting all over my face. By Wednesday morning my face was raw and irritated. Then I put some concealer on top of the comet sized cratar on my forehead and that(sarcasm) made(sarcasm) it(sarcasm) so(sarcasm) much (sarcasm) better.

Stay with me here because I am so going to make this a devotional...

I have issues with pride. Yep, pride.

You see, here lately, I've felt pretty proud of my good skin. Over the last few years I've had severe oily skin and many breakouts. About six months ago I discovered a new face product and it has changed my skin dramatically. No more oil, minimal zits and smooth skin...I was the "after" picture. And people noticed. Just like I wanted them too.

When I was 18 years old, I worked at a camera store and the owner's wife would stop by every now and again and she would always comment on my fabulous porcelain skin. Did you just hear skin was FAB-u-lous. (Insert Sharpay singing here.) At that time, I didn't think having porcelain skin was all that big a deal and often sat outside in the sun...FACE UP WITHOUT ANY SUNSCREEN! There is no possible way that I could do that now because I have a friend named Tracey that is always there to offer me an assortment of appropriate sunscreen protection to keep my skin porcelain and cancer free. And those of you that have seen me the day after an Easter egg hunt, know what happens when I take my sunscreen responsibilities into my own hands...can anyone say farmer tan with a sleeveless Easter dress.

Anyhoo, here I am with a face full of zits. And my issue with pride just doesn't erupt on my face, it erupts into all areas of my life. And from what I understand...God isn't too fond of it. The pride. He mentions it like 49 times in the Bible so I would assume that if God says something that many times...I should make a note of it. Note taken. So I said to God this morning...

God, if you want me to be humble and show my zitty face to the www and tell them about my stinken pride, then I'm going to need you to confirm it...

Excuse me while I go check my email...

Open the only email in my inbox and read:

“To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity. To the pure you show yourself pure, but to the wicked you show yourself hostile. You rescue the humble, but you humiliate the proud” (Psalm 18:25-27).

So He's going to rescue me...maybe He'll use you. Got any quick cures for acne? Got any pride?

And if you leave me a comment that says, "Oh, it's not that bad." You'll be gettin' a verse about lying in your inbox.

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Monday, February 16, 2009

Let's Get Our Shower On...

It was just a few short months ago that I tipped you off to one of the young mommy mafia organizations that’s known as the hair bow mafia, but now it’s time I tell you about the big southern mommy mafia organization that is steeped in tradition and is one of the most powerful organizations within the young mommy mafia…

The Baby Shower Mafia

First of all, some of you may wonder what makes me an expert on such a subject as baby showers? I mean, you’re right, I only have two children so what would I know about baby showers??? And here is the answer…

I go to a lot of baby showers!!!

Over the last five years I have attended countless baby showers… Dare I say hundreds? I attended three baby showers just during the month of September, and I’m having what I call a slow baby shower year. My chicken salad and butter mint intake is at an all time low. So I will now share with you a few rules of the Baby Shower Mafia...

1. A Baby Shower Mafia Member must have a cabinet full of crystal and porcelain serve ware in various heights and widths. Exhibit A...

2. A Baby Shower Mafia Member has a closet full of decorative props in the colors of blue and pink. Please don't tell the mafia member that is hosting your shower that you are not finding out the sex of your baby because they will be so. put. out. with. you. BSMM's do not have a box of yellow or green's in the handbook.

3. A Baby Shower Mafia Member knows where to buy the best cake in town. If you are not a BSMM and you offer to buy the cake to bring to a shower there will be all sorts of interrogating questions about where you will buy the cake. Exhibit B...

This was the cake that I brought to a shower a few months back. When I offered to bring the cake all sorts of questions were sent my way such as...where? Target. Target? are you sure? yes, they make great cakes. really, what color will it be? pink. what will they put on it? No plastic babies, right? no clowns, right?

4. Baby Shower Mafia Members do not like to play tacky baby shower games like the one where you put the candy bar in the diaper and try to guess what kind it is. (I'm really good at this game) They also frown upon those who pull out a big ol' roll of Charmin to measure someone's pregnant girth...again, it's in the handbook.

5. Baby Shower Mafia Members do not believe in evites. There will be a paper invitation in your mailbox. They will most likely frown upon the passing around the thank you note envelope thing and writing your address on it for the honoree...I'm just sayin'.

Now I will offer up a couple terms that the Baby Shower Mafia Members speak of whenever they are gettin' their shower on....

Sip 'n' See: Apparently, a Sip 'n' See is kind of a post-facto baby shower where folks come over to "sip" some punch and "see" the new baby.

Petit four (plural: petits fours) is a small cake generally eaten at the end of a meal or served as part of a large buffet. The name is from the French petit four, meaning "small oven".

Chances are if you are not familiar with said terms & rules, you, most likely, are not a member of the Baby Shower Mafia. So are you a member or not a member?

And guess where I'll be this Friday night....a baby shower!

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Friday, February 13, 2009

Be Still My Soul

It was six years ago that I was introduced to the sounds of Selah. One of my preschool teachers had given me the Be Still My Soul album (yes, I still sometimes call it an album but it was actually a CD) and I took a little listen to it and thought it sounded good. I thought my friend Tracey might want to listen to it, and I gave it to her when she was leaving preschool one day. She was pregnant with Isaac and she knew that his time on earth would be short so needless to say it was a difficult time. She loved it and eventually purchased her own copy. She gave birth to Isaac on March 7 and he lived for about an hour. She told me that she listened to the CD many times in the following months.

Fast forward a few months later...

On Tuesday, May 20th, I received a phone call from my Dad saying that my oldest brother had died. It was the most difficult experience that my family had ever experienced. It was especially difficult because all of my family was in Michigan and I was here. These are the times when it's hard to be ten hours from your family. I started making arrangements to fly to Michigan, but I could not leave until Thursday afternoon. The next 48 hours were very difficult. There were lots of phone calls, lots of tears and lots of shock. I had a lot of things that I had to get done before I left for Michigan, so I popped that Selah CD into my mini-van CD player and went on my way...every word on this record was like healing oil to the broken hearted. I had never really listened to every. single. word. of Great is thy Faithfulness until that day. It was just a song that I had heard in church my entire childhood... until that day.

I made it to Michigan, our family made it through a funeral and it was time for me to come home again. I left the Selah CD with CraftiMama, and I think that's when she officially placed the CD player in her craft room. Many days she spent there making cards and listening to the words of every song. She said she played it loud. Sometimes your heart needs to hear it extra loud. I think we are now the owners of every Selah CD available.

It's my desert island music. If that's the only CD I can take...that's the one I'm taking. I like it because when they sing, it sounds like they mean it from their hearts. So when I heard that Selah was doing a benefit concert for the Hope Clinic at Brentwood Baptist Church, I knew that I wanted to go, so I emailed my friend Tracey to get the plan in motion. So we're going. Don't ya wanna come too? A girl's night out for a good cause.

I'm going Gold Circle for $'s for a good cause. You can click on the picture above to purchase your ticket or I've heard that you can buy them at the Lifeway Store, too. The Hope Clinic is saving babies and counseling mothers. It's a good cause. Let me know if you'll join us.

Lastly, I saw this video on another blog this morning and thought it needed to go here...

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Saturday, February 07, 2009

Shock & Awe

A week ago Thursday, I was put in yet another uncomfortable situation...

It was my turn to bring dessert to Bible study! Again.

The email reminder came in my inbox and I couldn't pretend like I didn't see it because I was the one who signed up to bring the "sweet". So, I started racking my brain for an easy idea and I remembered that one day last year, I made a super easy peach cobbler from a recipe that Becky gave me. I couldn't find the written recipe so I made an emergency phone call to Becky to confirm the ingredients. She confirmed ingredients, reviewed the directions and gave me a sweet "don't forget to add the butter" reminder. Becky has what some might call the cooking anointing and I'm quite sure she prayed up a word for me as soon as she hung up the phone.

Anyhoo, I stopped by the Kroger's on my way home and purchased my ingredients...

One large can of peaches

One small can of peaches (drained)

One yellow cake mix

One stick of butter ( Can I get an Amen!)

And I proceeded to follow these directions:

Preheat oven 350 degrees

Dump peaches in 9x13 pan

Dump cake mix over peaches

Melt butter and pour over cake mix

Insert into oven for 30-40 minutes or until bubbly.

Please now allow me to recreate the moment...

I walked into Heather's kitchen with my 9x13 dish as the smell of hot peaches and butter permeated throughout the house. The foil was removed from the dish and a hush fell over the room because it looked exactly like peach cobbler, peachy and bubbly. You see, I passed the first test...sight and smell. Yeah me!!! The second test would be the test that always makes me a little nervous...the taste test. My chiastic structure lovin' Bible study peeps began scooping out the peach goodness into their styrofoam bowls, along with a dollop of vanilla ice cream. There were lots of mmmm's & ohhhhhs and this is really good. I explained that it was Becky's recipe but that made someone assume that I actually had Becky make the recipe for me. I quickly straightened out that misunderstanding because I wanted the credit for this delicous fruit masterpiece. And then one of my very bestest friends walked into the living room to make this announcement..

There is peach cobbler in here if anyone wants some...

It's shockingly good!

Some might call it shockingly good, but I prefer to call it anointed. Thanks Becky!

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