I'm in the Mafia

Do you see these young mamas that I hang out with?


All in their cute strappy/strapless dresses, blogging on their laptops, going to the gym with their new fangled iPods and carrying their cute monogrammed diaper bags. Their so young. Their so hip. Their so 2008.

And then they all come over to my house and they want to play this game that all the young kids are playing these days...Mafia. I'm assuming you capitalize the word Mafia. I know it's what the kids are playing because my very own full grown adult daughter has played it. And I remember the first time she mentioned playing this game at a party that I immediately thought....

Oh my goodness, I hope that game doesn't have anything to do with the devil worshipping or anything. Yes. I. did. Because I always worry about what the kids are exposed to these days...you never know.

Anyhoo, it all turns out okay. I played the Mafia, they did "kill" me and now I'm a cool hip mama too.

How do I know?

Since I started hangin' with these mamas I have also acquired a...

laptop
iPod
monogrammed diaperbag purse

And then I did something really crazy...

CraftiMama: Turn your head for just a minute.

I wore a strappy sundress to VBS. Oh.yes.I.did.

And a couple of them have even invited me to the gym.

Someone stop me now before I hurt myself!

(Just for the record, I never had one monogrammed baby item with my children. Not a bag or a burp cloth. Just plain old white burp clothes that I now use to dust my house. I did however bust out some paint pens and try to write my child's name on a diaper bag once...does that count?)

I didn't use good judgment

It all started with a trip to the mall this past Saturday.


I don't go to the mall very often, and I tend to get all excited by all of the different choices. The choices were never ending. There was pretty color and fun clothes everywhere. Fun, girly, cute clothes. Lots of pink. I could have stayed there all day.


I went to B.Moss. Usually a good choice. Great store for the thirty-something crowd.


I saw a pair of shorts and I just wanted them. I don't know why. They were calling my name. They were so on sale.


So, this morning, I was in a hurry and needed something quick to wear. Something that wasn't wrinkled from sitting in the dryer all weekend.


I started out with a skirt, but the zipper kept gettin' stuck. I had to go to the shorts. I had no other options. So I put them on and went on my way. I went to a meeting. After the meeting I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror.


And these were my thoughts...


Why on earth would an almost 37 year old woman put bedazzled hearts on her butt? Why? I don't let my girls wear shorts with words on their bottoms...why would I put these shorts on and walk out of my house...why? How old am I?

Please don't think I'm being ultra conservative. I have some jeans and shorts with pockets that have some sequins and designs on the pockets. Those seem okay. And these shorts are okay too...

But (no pun intended) why would I put two large hearts on my rear? Why? Why would I want to call attention to something that is already large and doesn't need two bright blue flashers on it. I read Big Mama's blog about fashion...every Friday. I should know better.

Notice the additional sequins on the front pockets. I was obviously channeling Porter Wagner when I made this purchase.
But in my defense, Miss B.Moss buyer, what were you thinking? Did you used to be the buyer at Justice or Limited Too? Was there some confusion?

P.S. Please don't call Clinton and Stacey.

No, I'm not joining the Village People

Welcome, I will be taking you on a brief tour of the new preschool building at my church. It's not finished yet, but it won't be much longer.

Yes, I have to wear the cool hard hat or they won't let me in. I keep telling them that I don't really do hats because my hair is too big, but those construction guys don't really get it. Something about OSHA laws, safety and such.

This is one of the new baby rooms. The counters are covered in cardboard right now, but they are actually blue to match the "accent" wall. All of the cabinets are tan. Every room has a different accent color.

This room right here....it's my new resource room. It's an organizing junkies dream. Not that I'm an organizing junkie or anything. It's going to have a sink, refrigerator, microwave and a dishwasher! It's like moving out of your starter home and into your dream home with super duper closets! Other side of the resource room with floor to ceiling shelves. Just picture it...clear containers with nice, neat labels. Please don't even think about using any homemade sharpie marker labels in my new resource room.
My handy dandy electronic label maker is going to be working overtime!

Semi-Homemade with Teresa

Mom, I'm bored. If you've heard that one too many times this summer, then here's a fun little snack for the kids to make. All the ingredients are available at the Superb Target. It's not too messy, you don't need an oven and your kids will think you're all sorts of fun.

It's not everyday that you will see this girl churnin' out a crafty, little snack for the kids. But it turns out she learned a little something at VBS this year. She learned how to make flip flop cookies.

You will need:

Keebler Vienna Finger Cookies

Icing in a tube

You will need to purchase the handy little tips that are right next to the tubes of icing.

(Teresa chose red, white and blue. You could choose the color of your favorite pair of flip flops. I would have preferred pink.)

M&Ms

Step 1

Step 2

Look out Sandra Lee.

Hotdog Review, The Varsity, Atlanta

So, if you attended the Deeper Still Conference in Nashville last year, then you are fully aware that there were some issues with the food service. Long lines. Lots of long lines. And all though we did get to go Deeper Still last September, we were hungry still.

Anyhoo, this time they decided to offer up a box lunch. Ya know, a turkey sandwich, water, cookie, apple and chips, all in a handy cardboard box. The box lunch. It's a handy little organized system. And y'all know how I love some organization. We were very excited about our little white boxes with food.

Until...

we saw 19,437 other women standing in the same line to get their cute little white box.

It was like a bad prison movie. Our uniforms were capri pants and floral print tops. I was so hungry and tried to stand on my tippy toes to see what the hold up was. The hold up was the 19,434 other women. Notice I said 19,434 women. That's because BooMama and BigMama had a nice friend that brought them lunch and they didn't have to stand in the line. And I'm going to start leaving comments on her blog today so that the next time a Deeper Still Conference rolls around maybe I can get in on that chicken salad.

Anyhoo, while I was standing in the line I was thinking...

it must be nice to be Beth, Priscilla or Kay because they probably get to eat at a nice buffet.

it must be nice to be in the band because they probably get to eat at the nice buffet too.

it must be nice to be married to someone in the band because the spouses probably get to eat at the buffet too.

And then I saw this girl...

Meet April. She goes to my church. Her husband Wes is in the band. I ran into her in the women's prison food line. I asked April why she wasn't eating at the special "band" buffet table? She showed me her tickets and said she had to stand in line like everybody else. The next time her husband signs a contract to be the guitar player at a major women's conference, he needs to negotiate a lunch deal for his honey. A woman needs to eat.

We did eventually get our cute little white boxes and we ate. But it just didn't satisfy.

On Friday afternoon Teresa G mentioned something about this hotdog stand. I really didn't think it would be possible to go there because I assumed that it was in the suburbs and would be too far out of the way. (a hotdog stand in the suburbs, what was I thinkin') Just to make sure, I called the Medium Nanny at 10:30 on Friday night so that she could google and mapquest the hotdog stand in relation to our hotel. It was just over a mile from our hotel and we made a plan to go there after Saturday's conference.

And now I will just let the pictures tell of His goodness to me...

This is the chili-cheese-slaw dawg with an order of onion rings. I also had a frosted orange drink. The frosted orange is like a dreamsicle in a cup. Obviously, you can see that God adores me.

When I saw my friend Teresa at church on Sunday, she immediately asked how many times I embarrassed Alicia at the Deeper Still Conference. I know, can you believe that someone would ask such a thing? And I promptly told her that I did not embarrass Alicia at Deeper Still. I probably didn't embarrass her until I put on this hat, took a bite of my delicious hotdog, raised my hands in the air to give a shout of praise to God and got back in the line again for my second hotdog. Yes, I had to get another. It was that good. Best dawg ever!

Thank you Alicia for being such a good friend and for going to the Varsity even though you hate hotdogs.

Hotdog review #1, Hotdog review #2